Underestimated

In the book, Underestimated, J.B. Hadley talks about how skeptical he was before he took his son to their first Spelling session. In the world of autism, there are so many different treatments and therapies, but what helps one doesn't always help another. I have learned to do the research first, talk to other parents, and go from there. Every single thing we have tried or done for Nolan has been to help him have a better life. I think the biggest worry in the back of every special needs parent's head is, "What will happen to my kid when I am gone?" Our goal is to prepare him for this as best as we can. I didn't know anyone who had done Spelling to Communicate before. But on the Spellers website, I filled out an interest form, and they set up a Zoom call to answer any questions I had. The main thing I wanted to know was, "Out of all the people that attempt this form of communication, how many are not successful?" Her answer was, "zero." She told me that it is hard work and takes patience and consistent practice. It is a marathon, not a sprint. But those who stick with it have been successful. That was all I needed to hear.

There are many different practitioners all over the United States who teach S2C, but I had read so much information from Spellers that I knew that was where I wanted to go. Worst case scenario is that we waste time and money. But the best case scenario? Nolan's and our lives changed forever. I filled out the application and had to send in a video of Nolan doing basic movements for them to review. After that, we were booking tickets to Tampa, Florida, for an appointment! I was so nervous on that first day of training because I knew what was possible, but also didn't want to get our hopes up.

When Dana Johsnon, the practitioner, came into the waiting room, she did something that nobody had ever done. She looked right at Nolan and talked to him first instead of Hunter and me. She said, "Hi Nolan! I'm Dana, and I'm so excited you are here today! Are you ready?" Then she explained to him what we were about to do. This blew us away because most people talk about him and not to him. We had even been guilty of this because it doesn't always look like Nolan understands or is listening. Before our appointment, it was already explained to us that we would get right into training and then Dana would discuss things with us afterward. She and Nolan immediately sat down at a table, and she told him that she would read an article, and then she would teach him how to use the letterboard. As she began to read to him about space, we couldn't help but notice it was on a much higher level than he had been exposed to. I couldn't pronounce some of the words, much less spell them!

A good part of the first session was getting comfortable with the letterboards and how to use them. After that, they practiced spelling a few words from the article. Next, she asked him a question about the article. While I am sitting there, trying ot think of the answer to the question and how to spell it, Nolan is already busy pointing to each letter of the correct answer! He was spelling words like diversity, galaxies, and terrestrial. Hunter and I just looked at each other in shock. This went on for about 30 minutes, and then it was our turn to ask Dana the questions.

How does he know how to spell those words?

He was making noises and laughing and squealing the entire time you read the article, how was he paying attention?

What in the world is going on??

Dana just smiled, because she hears these questions every single day. She explained that just because Nolan can't speak doesn't mean he can't hear. In fact, his hearing is probably better than ours. He can make all his noises and bounce around the room, and still hear and understand what is going on around him. The outside doesn't always match the inside. He doesn't have to look at a person to understand what they are saying. What I heard was that all those therapy sessions where Nolan learned and practiced to look someone in the eyes to listen to them were a bunch of bologna!

She also explained that Nolan absorbs information from everywhere. Just because he could barely prove he knows first grade level information, he actually knows his age level and more! And Nolan isn't the exception. Every day, she sees kids and adults with autism who do the exact same thing. We have to presume competence. That means assume the person wants and can learn things that are appropriate for his age level, whether he can prove it or not. Through S2C, these individuals are proving this is true every single day! I saw this in videos and in books before our appointment. But nobody could prepare me to see this with my own child!

This is a major mind shift and has changed the way we see our son, talk to him, and treat him. That has made all the difference and has changed our lives! In the next blog post, I'll explain how and why Spelling to Communicate works for those with nonverbal autism and share some videos of Nolan doing his thing with the letterboard!